Being where you are, starting where you are… means that it’s okay to feel numb.

It’s okay to check out of your body.

For some of us that is the only way we know to survive.

And sure, there may be other ways, and yes, healing is available to every person… but that doesn’t mean that if you’re not connecting with your body that you’re doing something wrong.

This is so important and not addressed enough, especially by folks like me who are working with the body.

I’m noticing these shortcomings in my own messaging and wanted to speak to this idea that coming home to yourself, unpacking your “stuff”, or healing trauma, need to happen in a certain way.

Like a before and after picture or a big reveal. Like, “Ta-da! I connected with my body and magicked my pain away”.

There isn’t one right way to heal.

I want to explicitly say that if you are not comfortable interacting with your body, if your body feels like an unsafe place to be, if you dissociate or avoid, or have a tenuous relationship with your coping mechanisms…

It’s because at one point you needed to do that to survive.

And it’s okay to NOT connect with your body if that’s where you need to be right now.

Connecting with yourself or your body doesn’t have to happen right now and it doesn’t have to be one more thing you’re “supposed” to do.

That’s not how healing works.

It doesn’t have to be cathartic. It doesn’t have to be big and explosive. It can be slow and delicate and subtle.

You can choose the pace and the way and your pace and your way will always be okay.